its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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