At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
