I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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