I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
