yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
