if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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