I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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