Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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