I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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