im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
