when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
