definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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