So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
