Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
i now understand why vodka
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
