I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
