weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
