There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
