my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
