A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
