dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
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You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.