Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
