beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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