On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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