He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize