Texts From Last Night

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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Nipple clamps can be ambiguous

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  (651): Nipple clamps can be ambiguous http://tfl.nu/3muz
  Replies (2) Good night (933) Bad night (1413)
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  (310): View more from California

  first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona

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  (310): first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona http://tfl.nu/f4h4
  Replies (16) Good night (956) Bad night (2232)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.

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  (802): I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel. http://tfl.nu/5pvk
  Replies (25) Good night (702) Bad night (3329)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot

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  (214): I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot http://tfl.nu/eus9
  Replies (14) Good night (4689) Bad night (1248)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.

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  (307): Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding. http://tfl.nu/82eq
  Replies (10) Good night (4496) Bad night (771)
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  (+27): View more from South Africa

  She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."

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  (+27): She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga." http://tfl.nu/sbmz
  Replies (13) Good night (2045) Bad night (911)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE

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  (612): Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE http://tfl.nu/81rr
  Replies (3) Good night (1369) Bad night (585)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.

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  (978): Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace. http://tfl.nu/dayc
  Replies (4) Good night (1316) Bad night (534)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  that is an amazing summary hahaha

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  (847): I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day. (1-847): that is an amazing summary hahaha http://tfl.nu/zrw7
  Replies (6) Good night (1709) Bad night (1129)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.

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  (206): Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table. http://tfl.nu/tpao
  Replies (3) Good night (1631) Bad night (525)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.

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  (620): So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive. http://tfl.nu/y5fy
  Replies (8) Good night (671) Bad night (1938)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo

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  (540): I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo http://tfl.nu/4u98
  Replies (2) Good night (1488) Bad night (475)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become

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  (519): I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become http://tfl.nu/18v7
  Replies (3) Good night (637) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  You mean maximum 5?

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  (306): I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself (1-306): You mean maximum 5? http://tfl.nu/1ybr
  Replies (5) Good night (1104) Bad night (422)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.

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  (781): Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/7fu0
  Replies (4) Good night (466) Bad night (676)

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