He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
