Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
