Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
