Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Just high enough for therapy.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
