You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize