whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Is her dick bigger than yours?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
