I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
