singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
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