dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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