Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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