It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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