you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
