3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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