her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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