He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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