Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
