So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
