Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.

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(716): View more from New York

I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.

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(213): View more from California

You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(815): View more from Illinois

i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.

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(816): View more from Missouri

If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.

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(705): View more from Ontario

I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.

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(613): View more from Ontario

So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.

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(315): View more from New York

Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.

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