I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize