Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize