yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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