did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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