I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She's the barista slut.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
