What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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