Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
high people should be assigned attendants
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
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Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
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did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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