STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
